The Art of Making a Great First Impression

Co-authored by Jayne Mattson

Whether we’re networking for a new job, joining a new group, or meeting our new neighbors, we all want to make a great first impression. But often we can be our own worst enemy and sabotage first impressions by talking too much or too little about ourselves.

One of us, Jayne Mattson, a career consultant and Founder of CareerEngage, has developed a simple-but-effective strategy to ensure we make positive first impressions with those we meet.

She suggests that the next time you introduce yourself (or get introduced) to someone new, remember four words: YOU…YOU…ME…YOU

After the initial handshake and name exchange, get other people talking about themselves (YOU…YOU) by asking questions, showing interest, and following up with more questions to learn more about their background and interests. Then find an opportunity to share something about yourself (…ME) and then try to end the conversation with a renewed focus on them (…YOU).

In other words, the best strategy for making a great first impression is NOT by trying to impress other people with your own qualities and success, but by ensuring they walk away from the conversation 1) feeling heard, valued and energized and 2) learning something positive and memorable about you.

FAQ

What if the other person doesn’t reciprocate in the conversation?

If the other person doesn’t reciprocate in the conversation, don’t worry. Conversations rarely flow in a rigid back-and-forth way. Instead, look for opportunities to steer the conversation back to them by asking open-ended questions or showing genuine interest in what they have to say.

How can I ensure I don’t talk too much or too little about myself?

To ensure you strike the right balance in the conversation, try to ask 3-4 questions of the other person before talking about yourself. Build your next question off what they have just said, and use what you’ve learned about the other person to selectively emphasize things that you have in common.

Conclusion

YOU…YOU…ME…YOU is a simple yet powerful strategy to make a great first impression. By showing genuine interest in others and striking a balance between talking about yourself and listening to the other person, you can leave a positive and lasting impact on those you meet. Remember, it all starts with building meaningful connections and relationships based on mutual respect and understanding.